The Worst Pokemon

Here we go dudes. My top worst Poket Monsters picks.

I just want to let you know: Metapod is not on my list. Magickarp is not on my list.

Here’s why:

I think these guys are genius.

Sure, Metapod was a infuriating asshole, endlessly using “harden” in 20 hour long battle with some turd trainer on the side of Route 1, cheering in prepubescent falsetto.

Sure, Magikarp is useless with his dumb face splashing around while Electrabuzz forcibly rapes him up the butt.

But the concept behind these two is brilliant. You just think these guys are the biggest pieces of shit. Frustratingly floundering around using useless “attacks” just getting the absolute shit kicked out of them over and over and over again. I mean, hell yeah; I’d smash my game boy when all the powerful guys in my party crap out and all I had was a Magikarp with an extra chromosome stinking up the place in a puddle of his own diarrhea. But I think the surprise of them evolving into some bad ass dudes is a really cool touch in the game.

It’s an interesting dynamic that you don’t see often in video games. One I’d like to see more of. Sticking with a feeble character, hoping he’ll eventually turn into something absolutely devastating. Turning into a guy you could count on when super douche Gary Oak pops up to smack you in the face.

So no, none of those guys will be on the list. I’m more looking at the Pokemon that make me say “who the hell came up with this dumb, dumb idea… And why…?”